Being a mother is not glamorous but there is no other job on earth that will ever measure up.

I just celebrated my 40th mother’s day. In fact I can hardly believe that I have been a mom for that many years. (Not even close to the 80 years that my mom celebrated mother’s day - halfway there though!) Even as a small girl when I was asked what I wanted to do with my life - I always answered “be a mom”. I never answered - “teacher” or “scientist” or “nurse” or “sports analyst” or anything else - even though I know I could have been any of those things - perhaps not the scientist!

For the past 6 years I have followed and I have been wrapped up in the Pearson family on the tv show - THIS IS US. The plot begins with Rebecca Pearson (the mom) giving birth to triplets on Jack Pearson (the dad’s) 36th birthday. The lives of Rebekah, Jack and their three children - Kevin - Kate and Randall - are presented at different points in time. The Rebecca and Jack stories generally take place during the early stage of their marriage, the births of the “triplets” and the different phases of the children’s upbringing while separate stories concerning Kevin, Kate and Randall are also presented in their adult years - each one of them with their own particular narratives.

I love this show because it’s the story of a family and the love that they share through the good, the bad and ugly. The kids are born right around the time my kids were born and even though I didn’t have triplets, my boys were born very close together and it often felt like there were triplets in the house. Their story is my story - a young couple with more month than money - three kids/two parents (always outnumbered by the kids) - the sudden death of Jack leaving Rebecca having to learn to live as a widow and the kids lost without their dad - her second marriage to Miguel - growing older and dealing with Miguel’s heart disease and Rebecca’s alzheimer’s disease - and the “big three” (as they are known on the show) living out their lives in their careers with their families. But the backbone of the show is Rebecca - the mom. Mandy Moore plays the part of Rebecca and while this blog is not about her or the show - she is brilliant, portraying the role of a mother from day one until her death. I laughed and cried through most every episode and there are only two more shows until it is off the air. I’ll miss the Pearson family. I’ll miss Rebecca.

BEING A MOM IS NOT GLAMOROUS! It’s millions of moments of caring and loving your littles…..it’s getting out of your warm bed (sometimes) many times a night to comfort your child……it’s answering the same questions over and over again……it’s preparing meal after meal after meal to feed those hungry bellies…….it’s washing dish after dish after dish………it’s wiping runny noses and wiping up vomit…….it’s changing diapers…….it’s picking up those tiny lego pieces……..it’s doing endless loads of laundry and matching up all those wayward socks…….it’s singing to and rocking your baby to sleep…….it’s somewhat boring at times to read the same story again and again because it’s “their favourite”…….it’s monotonous pushing the swing at the park……it’s exhausting…..it’s frustrating…..it’s lonely……

SO IF MOTHERHOOD IS NOT GLAMOROUS - WHY WOULD ANY WOMAN PURSUE IT?

BECAUSE IT’S NECESSARY.

BECAUSE IT’S A CALLING.

I still remember the first time I was referred to as a mom. Zac was exactly 8 hours old. Randy and I were looking through the nursery window and nurse called out - are you “baby boy Jolliffe’s mom?” Yes I was. My dream as a young girl was now reality. I didn’t mother perfectly - in fact, many times I was more imperfect than I would have wished but I mothered like a rockstar. I loved that pile of snowy white diapers - folded and piled high ready for the next day……I loved nursing my babies and singing hymns and lullabies to soothe them before sleep……I loved cooking their favourite meals……..I loved doing laundry……….I loved attending their games and cheering them on whatever playing field they were on……….I loved seeing them find the love of their lives and marry and have children themselves………..I love them as adults, men who have found their particular place in this world, doing what they are called to do. I know they are where they are today - because of God’s grace on our family life - giving us the wisdom and love needed to raise our own version of the “big three”.

One of my favourite preachers of old is C.H. Spurgeon. Here is one of his quotes about the role of mothers in the lives of their children.

‘Please understand that you have a very sacred trust reposed in you by God! He has in effect said unto you, “Take this child away, and nurse it for me, and I will give thee thy wages”. ‘ That’s enough. That’s more worthwhile than anything else in this world.

FORTY MOTHER’S DAYS HAVE COME AND GONE. REGRETS - I HAVE A FEW - mostly just one! I wish we could have had a few more - there was room in my heart for a few more children but it wasn’t meant to be.

So then, these are the things I’ve learned in 40 years - from experience, from my own mother and sisters, from my friends, and from my own daughter’s in laws (as they mother my grandchildren).

Grow yourself as a mom daily - for me as a Christian - I tried to read a verse or two from the Bible - sing a hymn and pray everyday.

Love your husband and let your kids see you loving him - tell him in front of the kids that you love him and are committed to your marriage.

Teach your children practical things liking making their beds, putting their clothes and toys away, doing the dishes etc.

Be consistent. When you say something - let them know you mean it.

Teach manners - "yes, please”, “no, thank you” - goes a long way in life.

Attend church and Sunday School together as a family.

Know that your kids are watching you and will imitate your behaviour.

Laugh a lot. Smile. Tell funny stories. Listen to your kids tell their funny stories and laugh together.

Hang out with like minded families.

Pray! Pray! Pray!

Being the mom to Zac, Ben and Pete, has been my greatest joy and accomplishment. It was a privilege to raise these sons to manhood.

Someone is going to be influencing your child during his earliest years, pouring values and imprinting standards on that impressionable young soul. Let it be you. I can assure you that the price you will pay for mothering will fade into insignificance as you see your children grow in Christ, and desire to follow Him in their own lives.

“Let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up” (Galatians 6:9).